I discovered a shocking statistic the other day.
I started thinking about the number of guys I must have chatted up, flirted with or asked out in my life.
I would say that on average I chat up or ask out about two guys every week and I’ve been doing that for the past 13 years. That means that in my life I’ve tried my luck with around 1250 guys. When I worked this out I had to check it through a couple of times – I could hardly believe it. Out of 1250 guys, none of them wanted to be my boyfriend.
It’s possible I’m overestimating when I say I chat up about two guys a week. Say it’s really more like one a week that I make an obvious effort to give my number to or ask out. That’s still 676 guys who have turned me down.
And for some reason, I keep trying.
The weird thing is, if you’d tried to do anything else in life 676 times and failed, you’d give up. If you were trying to get a book published and you’d written to 676 agents over 13 years and they’d all said no you may come round to thinking that perhaps the book was a no-hoper after all.
Not only is my success rate 0% in terms of finding a boyfriend, it’s pretty low in terms of getting even a date. It’s difficult to estimate how many guys I’ve been on dates with in the past 13 years but I’m going to say around 40 (that’s NOT including online dates, they don’t count, anyone can get one of those). So my success rate for getting even one date is around 5% – also pretty poor. My success rate for any kind of fling that lasted more than one date? Around 1.5%.
Anyway, that’s enough maths, the point I’m making with all this is that despite an absolutely terrible success rate, I still can’t bring myself to give up. Because if I give up, what is there then?
What I can take from this is that I must be better than I thought at taking so much rejection. Sometimes it doesn’t feel like that though. Each time I’m turned down feels as sad and disappointing as ever.
What’s your number? How many times have you been rejected? Do the maths.